Are you a FOLLOWER or a LEADER?

We all were born with many, qualtities and skills already and at the same time we have to realize that we can’t be good in everything. It’s good to be honest to ourselves about this in order to get to know our strongest abilties and to know what can be delegated to others. People who are more specialized in other areas, who have more expertice.

Take a good look at people / leaders you admire, which habits and behaviors would you like to master yourself?

Richard Branson is a good example for me, why do people like to work for him? His answer is:” People are the core of a successful business, give them the freedom to develope themselves so they can start working somewhere else. Treat them that good and they don’t want to work for someone else!”

A great leader is someone people like to follow:

1.    They have a a great attitude.

2.    They know how to work with others.

3.    They have courage.

4.    Have self control.

5.    A keen sense of justice.

6.    Have definiteness of decision and plans.

7.    Do more than they are paid for.

8.    Have a pleasent personality.

9.    Have sympathy and understanding.

10. Are creative.  

11. Have a vision.

12. Are a master of details and know how to delegate

13. Have the willingness to take full responsibility.

14. Can cooporate.

Everyone can develope these skills from within by understanding ourselves first and getting control over ourselves.

To be a good leader we have to be an intelligent follower first.

 

A great quote of Napolean Hill: “Most great leaders began in the capacity of followers. They became great leaders because they were intellligent followers. With few exceptions, the person who can not follow a leader intelligently cannot become an efficient leader”

Every company needs a good leader because the moral always filters down from the top and not the other way around. When companies tell us they don’t need help, what they are actually saying is that they are in NEED. We just have to take a look at the staff of a company to get an impression of the leader. 

A great quote of the TIR program is:” The goal of most leaders is to get the people tot think highly of them as a leader. But the goal of the exceptional leader is to get the people tot think highly of themselves”

What kind of leader do you want to be? How do you want to treat your employees?

What we know and really do!

     

At an early age we take in everything through our sensory factors we hear, see, smell, taste and touch for real. The way we hear people talk, what their opinion is about certain topics, see, smell and taste what they eat. This gets embedded in our subconscious mind through repetition. We live from this part of the mind 95 % each day, this is called our programming. The way we are programmed is being expressed through our body by our bahavior and habits.

By observing people we are able to see how they live from their subconscious mind, the place our behavior and habits are stored. It is like living from an automatic pilot system, a pattern. We copy our parents, teachers, the people we were raised by.

A lot of money is spend on educating people in schools and companies and they gather a lot of information. And why aren’t they doing what they got taught to do, through their intellect, their conscious mind? Why aren’t we getting other results, better results after gaining more information?

“ Education does not mean teaching people what they do not know. It means teaching them to behave as they do not behave” :  a great quote of John Ruskin.

And he is right! When we know that our behaviors and habits are stored in our subconscious mind and we want to have other results, we have to be conscious about our paradigm’s first. 

For example: We’d like to shape our body for the summer season and made the resolution to visit the sportschool 3 times a week. We start enthusiastic and after some weeks we skip one time and end up going once a week or no more. We act like a thermostat at home, when the temperature drops the thermostat brings it back at the temperature it was set. It is the same with us, we will go back to the behavior we had regarding sports. And of course we have good reasons doing this but is this helping us and changing our results?

So take a deep look inside and be honest to yourself. Why are you getting the same results over and over again? Where did you start believing in, what is stored in your subconscious mind that you’d like to change?

It can make you feel vulnarable and that is good, only from vulnarability we can be true to ourselves and change our results. Change your non- supportive actions in supportive ones.

Go for it you deserve it!

Jeannette Knoppers, www.switchtoresults.com

When did you leave someone with the impression of increase?

How great it is to get a compliment. It is just a small gesture with wonderful consequences. We are often to busy thinking of ourselves, our work, problems, getting attention by being funny, nagging that we don’t connect at a deeper level and lack interest in the otherone.

In every person or situation there is something good and mostly we are not aware of this in the first place. We can try and look for the good in every situation and every person we get in contact with and   practice this by giving a sincere compliment.

When we express the good we first will feel better about ourselves and the other one will be happy meeting you.

Complimenting a person influences every aspect of abundance in our life such as: relationships, work, success, health and emotional well being.

Ask yourself after every meeting if you left this person with a good feeling about themselves and what changes could be made that will give more benifits. What we send out will come back to us in a thousand ways.

A nice quote of Wallace D. Wattles is:

“Leave every person you come in contact with, with the impression of increase”

Going through the TIR program myself made me aware of the way I communicated with others. Most of the time I was talking and thinking what to answer and now I try to listen really well and give a sincere response. People feel more seen and heard and the connection will improve.

We can practice this and stand like a beacon.

We will be what we think about, so thinking good about the other, the situation will be projected at our life too. It is the circulation of life, a continual flowing around. Attention should be directed rather to the giving than the receiving. 

Thomas Troward said:”We must look upon ourselves, not as misers” chests to be kept locked for our own benefit, but as centers of distribution; and the better we fulfill our function as such centers the greater will be the correspondig inflow”

It is good to bring your mind in harmony with the laws of the universe, which says:” What you put out is what comes back. So give it your best and do things in a certain  and conscious way.

Good luck! I’m very curious about the changes in your life and the results you will gain.

Thanks to the TIR teaching of Bob Proctor and Sandy Gallagher

Jeannette Knoppers, www.switchtoresults.com

5: # 4 steps to Non Violent Communication.

A year after my husband died I attended a workshop ‘Non Violent Communication’ of Marshall Rosenberg. On my way to the seminar at the Erasmus University in Rotterdam, I met an Italien lady who went to a similar workshop from him in England years before. She used the technic in raising her 4 year old daughter and was so grateful for the information she got. It changed her Family life completely.

During my training to become a therapist I noticed the impact of unconscious communication. Also in the relation with my kids, clients, friends I became aware of the influence of conscious communication for us as human beings.

We are conditioned to tell what we don’t want instead of what we want. Also to express our negative instead of our positive feelings and give orders instead of doing requests. Often we are afraid to express our true feelings and when we really do we give others the possibility to tune in and this results in understanding.

Using the technic at home in the therapy and coaching we provide, I realized how

supportive it is in getting other results. The feedback of clients I get is really amazing, the interaction between colleagues, siblings, Family, friends improved so positively. Even my own children tell me: “ Thank you Mom, we get along very well!”

Gandhi said:” Violence starts in our language!” So maybe it is could to get aware of the way we speak.

Non Violent Communication asks us to speak from what we see, hear or notice, without the use of the words: ‘You’ or ‘Your’  and ‘Not or None’

The steps are:

1.    To speak from the ‘I’

2.    Express our feeling about the issue.

3.    Tell what we really want.

4.    Do the request.

When we start communicating in this way, infighting will disappear and we really get to the core of the things we want to discuss. We are more clear and speak form our truth.

I am also very happy with the tools I got from Marshall and the positive changes it brought into my life.

How do you communicate with others? Are you aware of the words you use? Do you speak from what you want or don’t want? What changes would you like for yourself?

Do you leave someone behind with the impression of increase? This will be the theme of my next post.

Jeannette Knoppers, www.switchtoresults.com